Waking up & Reflecting too early on a Wednesday

Had really good waffles at a coffee shop in ktown with kitty last night.
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I realized my Dorian Gray obsession was getting more serious when I mulled on getting home that my name is also the same number of letters and syllables (people with three syllable first names happen to be more successful, fact. thats why my brother and sister have the same similarities to DGs name)
Dorian= 6 letters Gray= 4
Andrea= 6 Chen= 4
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There are so many sketches I havent been able to scan since the weekend. So frustrating! CS and scanner need to be fixed asap. I would also like a lightbox (or projecter, so a lightbox that projects) and wacom tablet.

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Someone recommended I watch the movie "Claire Dolan", so I looked it up, and really loved this part of Roger Ebert's review. Just a really nice little excerpt.

"There is a scene in the movie where she is seated in a bar, bothering no one, not looking for attention. Two men walk up. "I'm not looking for company," she says. "That's not your decision," says the first man, who is aggressive and menacing.

She seems in danger. She looks up at the man who is looming over her, his aggression pulsing in his face. Then she looks at his sidekick, who hangs back. "I prefer him," she says. "He's better-looking than you. Would you let him go first?" The scene is no longer than my description of it. It is just about perfect. She has changed the subject. She understands the tension that must exist between two men who have agreed to harass a woman. Beneath their relationship is a fear of women, which links to sexual insecurity; she has castrated the first by preferring the second, and called the bluff of the second by depriving him of his leader. The men are stopped cold, and skulk away."
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Another someone recently put down Madonna to me in conversation, and I secretly got a little hurt. I do not think she's psycho. I think she's someone from a small town who came to New York and was really ambitious and went through a lot of shit, and it made her the way she is. Or maybe she was always that way. I think this is one of the moments I first started to like her. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBTl611c9fs

Insomnia continues to haunt me. I'm kept up at night, wondering what else life is than just wanting to be remembered, and affecting people. Why is it that its hard for some people to understand my way of thinking. How will I ever get what I want in life. I have wild fantasies when it's late and I don't censor my thoughts, of old wood and large houses, of seeing the world. Is there more to be had from others than just pleasure? Why are pleasure and happiness never the same thing. I'm constantly trying to control myself, and wonder what it would be like to not keep myself in check.

Put your heart in my hands and I won’t hurt you
Put your heart in my hands, I promise not too
(build you up, by nelly furtado)

inspirations:

:(:)

Wingbowl photos..

The event was so much fun, loved Kobayashi and his pretty publicist Maggie, and met Ron Jeremy, and saw lots of chicken wings get eaten. I'm glad to be back in NY, at home with the cat.

Kobayashi, Ron Jeremy Join 'Good Day': MyFoxPHILLY.com

Wingbowl 19

I'll be hanging with Kobayashi tomorrow 5-9 AM at Wingbowl, on CBS.
Getting on a bus to Philly with Adrienne in a bit, be back friday night. It'll be a welcome break from the city for a little bit.

Happy Chinese new year

I really liked my mood last week. Was so productive. This week's been a downer. That's okay. One bad thing about being productive is I usually battle insomnia in the same state. So although less happy tonight, I think I'll be able to sleep. Gnight

ok i'm done being dumb. and i miss you.

Pertinent